moving, Seattle

Going Back

Tuesday morning was a lot like many other Tuesday mornings. Hopped on the 667 headed for downtown. Looked forward to one of my favorite scones for breakfast and a noon appointment with my favorite hair gal, Nina. Thought about which of my frequent skyway lunch spots or food trucks I’d visit. But those other Tuesday mornings were more than a year and a half ago and this was just a temporary walk down memory lane.

It was kind of neat to see some familiar faces on my old bus and in the skyways as I walked around. I got all caught up with Nina and made plans for another visit next time I’m in town. Visited the new brick and mortar shop of one of my food trucks and was happily greeted and questioned about my new life.

This was after Sunday at a hip-hop festival with a bestie, then a beautiful Memorial Day spent with my college roommates and sister, like it had only been days since I’d seen them last. And those were followed by a Twins game, again with my best friends, in a place I loved so much I bought season tickets to watch a dreadful team I never really followed, where I ran into another friend and was just as excited to be there as I had ever been.

And then dinner with my best friend from high school at one of our most visited dinner spots. I took the long way home and drove the parkway where I learned to drive, then continued on past Brownie & Cedar Lakes where I often enjoyed spending my time.

Thursday brought lunch with my dad in the neighborhood I grew up in. Then happy hour with old coworkers, people who brought me so much joy every day even the most dreadful work days were somehow ok. Saturday I returned to the cabin I once loved so much I lived there for six summers. Celebrated my dad’s birthday with my best friends and fam and sang with the classic country band I sing with whenever they’re around. And, to really top it all off.. my old bowling crush showed up at my step brothers’ bar! One hundred miles from the place I knew him from. This week was like a highlight reel of life before my move.

I felt… almost at home.

Going back couldn’t have come at a more perfect time. As I’m in a particularly frustrating phase right now, some might wonder if perhaps I regret my move and some of the choices I’ve made. Though I was incredibly happy to be back in my old routine for two days with a schedule packed full of time with my family and friends, I didn’t once feel like I was home.

It feels somewhat bad expressing that, as I mean no offense to those here I love. I miss them and always look forward to seeing them again. But there’s just something I’m missing when I’m here. A friend in Seattle, also from Minnesota and now moving back, expressed to me recently that when she was visiting MN a few weeks back, she just felt content. And that is how I feel in Seattle, at least for now. I still don’t imagine myself ever moving back to the midwest, but can picture myself in many other coastal or mountainous lands.

It was tough saying goodbyes again today and yesterday but this morning I flew back to Seattle and I’m happy to be home.

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